Dear friends,

One lesson that really blessed me is learning how to truly forgive family, friends, etc... I've learned many of us truly never walk in unconditional forgiveness, which brings about resentment, bitterness and negative thought patterns. For me not forgiving was a protection mechanism which really added no value to my relationships with family, it only made them worse. In my case unforgiving led to unrealistic expectations and never dealt with the real issues which was rooted in unforgiveness and false expectations. It was amazing because I could have a casual friends and every time we go out have a great time full of fun & excitement with never any arguments, because I had no expectations in my mind that person should be fulfilling for me. Yet, when it came to my personal family and people I cared for; I had my guards up and mind set on unrealistic expectations which only caused more friction. We can only be the change we want to see happen. I've learned you can only control you and not others. To establish successful relationships you must communicate your wants, needs, desires and expectations you are expecting to have fulfilled by the other person. For instance a friend and I both had enough stress in our lives and said hey "we are only going to have fun times". Not realizing it we had both set an expectation to make sure when we are together to make sure we have fun. You and your family members, friends, partner, etc... should collectively decide if you can meet each others expectations and they must be realistic. This way no one is being a mind-reader and you collectively determine if you share similar goals and values. Also if you say you forgive you must truly walk in love and forgive with your whole heart, not bringing back up the past. If you notice unhealthy patterns communicate them, walk in forgiveness give the person time to change if you believe in them or if not remove yourself if you notice a pattern that is just a "relationship deal breaker" something that just maybe beyond repair. In this life we have the power to choose to be happy, have fun and live a rewarding life! I want to grow old experiencing plenty of happy memorable times and so should you! We can't erase the past but we can truly control our future! Life is too short not to enjoy each other and you must begin with the woman/man in the mirror for a positive change.

In watching Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins at the movies this weekend, I was convicted on exactly what family represents. In the movie Roscoe was a successful talk show host who went back home to a family reunion. His family reminded him of all his shortcomings and weaknesses, like those closest to us sometimes do. His family challenged him and stretched him into the person he became and he had to love them just for them and vice verse. As they say if adversity doesn't kill you it makes you stronger! I think every household should see this movie. I truly related to Roscoe and in the end the movie gave me a greater appreciation for my family as well. It's never to late to change, communicate and make every relationship count!

Let's all choose to live happy fulfilled lives & make our relationships count!
Love you much!
Delisia